Victorian England was a time of unparalleled bawdiness for the upper class and sexual serfdom for the lower classes. Noblemen married for procreation and patronised prostitutes for their pleasure. Young virgins of the lower class were bought and sold like produce.
This hardly sounds like material for a comedy, but The Best House in London – scripted by Dennis Norden – is just that. It concerns the attempt of the government of the day to solve the prostitution problem by establishing a fabulous brothel in high-class Belgravia.
It’s a pleasure dome with two dozen differently designed rooms – including the King Solomon Room (all virgins), the Bluebeard Room, the Wrestling Room, the Roman Baths Room, and the Jungle Room.
David Hemmings has a dual role. He is Walter Leybourne, the lecherous procurer for the house and Benjamin Oakes, an ultra-respectable idealistic publicist who crusades against the upper class’s sexual exploitation of the poor.
George Sanders costars as Walter’s titled father, Sir Francis Leybourne, a seeming pillar of virtue whose primary source of income is derived from the opium fields of India. Sir Francis keeps a beautiful French mistress, Babette (Dany Robin), who he unknowingly shares with his son.
His niece, Josephine Pacefoot (Joanna Pettet), meanwhile, leads a “purity league” and has founded a hostel for reformed prostitutes with the help of Benjamin Oakes.
Sir Francis is killed on his Indian opium plantation, and Benjamin is framed by Walter on a rape charge while Josephine is kidnapped by the fiendish Chinese. It’s complicated, but all resolved in a rollicking climax. Warren Mitchell has a superb cameo as Count Pandolfo, the mad inventor of a super-airship.
There are so many quick-fire jokes – visual and verbal – that many of them flop, especially the weak satirical references to important figures of the day (Charles Dickens, Messrs. Fortnum and Mason, Dr Livingstone at al).
Benjamin Oakes/Walter Leybourne
David Hemmings
Josephine Pacefoot
Joanna Pettet
Sir Francis Leybourne
George Sanders
Babette
Dany Robin
Count Pandolfo
Warren Mitchell
Home Secretary
John Bird
Sylvester Wall
William Rushton
Inspector MacPherson
Bill Fraser
Editor of The Times
Maurice Denham
Chinese Trade Attache
Wolfe Morris
Headmistress
Martita Hunt
Charles Dickens
Arnold Diamond
Lord Tennyson
Hugh Burden
Lord Alfred Douglas
George Reynolds
Lady Dilke
Jan Holden
Algernon Charles Swinburne
Mike Lennox
Mr Fortnum
Arthur Howard
Mr Mason
Clement Freud
Dr Livingstone
Neal Arden
Mr Barrett
Walter Brown
Miss Elizabeth Barrett
Suzanne Hunt
Flora
Carol Friday
Phoebe
Marie Rogers
Singer
Tessie O’Shea
Flora’s Mother
Avril Angers
Felicity
Betty Marsden
Director
Philip Saville