“By the power vested in me by mawkish ITV documentaries presented by Martin Bashir, I now pronounce you a paedophile.”
BBC3’s Monkey Dust consisted of a series of interlinked, definitely-not-for-children animated sketches about sexual practices. There is little doubt that none of the material would have been broadcastable in live action form.
In this darkly comedic world, sex was always either demeaning or heartbreakingly disappointing: a voiceover actor’s pillow talk was so bland and passionless that his wife became convinced that he was faking interest, a pathetic balding man concocted preposterous excuses for being late home to conceal from his wife yet another shameful act of extramarital debauchery, and Steve the First-Time Cottager was attempting desperately to lead a flamboyant homosexual lifestyle which was hopelessly at odds with his modesty and shyness.
The series made much of British tabloid newspaper obsessions: a demonic Paedofinder General staged public executions of innocent people (including musical theatre star Topol – because of his Fiddler on the Roof character’s desire to “diddle diddle dum all day long”); three teenage boys had fun in a Muslim terrorist cell: and a team of TV executives created a new reality series called People on the Toilet.
The standout character in the series was the childlike Ivan Dobsky, an inmate at Crowmarsh Prison who was notorious as “the Meat-Safe Murderer.”
When new DNA evidence revealed his innocence 27 years later, he was released into society, along with his best friend, a sentient space hopper called Mr Hoppy (who the viewer learned had been the real murderer all along).
Voices
Morwenna Banks
Brian Bowles
Simon Greenall
Enn Reitel
Kate Robbins
Rebecca Front
Frances Barber
Tom Hillenbrand
Nick Holder
Simon Lipson
Ben Phillips
Kulvinder Ghir
Sharon Horgan
Peter Dickson
Colin McFarlane
In this darkly comedic world, sex was always either demeaning or heartbreakingly disappointing: a voiceover actor’s pillow talk was so bland and passionless that his wife became convinced that he was faking interest, a pathetic balding man concocted preposterous excuses for being late home to conceal from his wife yet another shameful act of extramarital debauchery, and Steve the First-Time Cottager was attempting desperately to lead a flamboyant homosexual lifestyle which was hopelessly at odds with his modesty and shyness.
The standout character in the series was the childlike Ivan Dobsky, an inmate at Crowmarsh Prison who was notorious as “the Meat-Safe Murderer.”
